Both of them can sit together and work out a solution that will help him to overcome his fear. He can also consider taking the help of a psychiatrist to accept change more readily.
This fear of change is inherent in each of us. Nobody wants to topple a life that is going smooth and easy. At the same time, you have to think about the future and take the plunge. “Nobody said marriage was easy. But in every way you can measure what is good for people and society, its worth the effort” (Hicks, 2010, p.5). Marriage gives you tremendous security, physical, emotional and mental support and a bonding that can last for a long time. The price you pay for these luxuries is the compromise that you have to make to include your spouse into your life. It is about accepting change and moving on to a more secure phase of your life.
This fear of change has to be conquered to prevent the marriage from ending in a divorce. “As people began to live longer they also came to realize that they might not want to remain in a bad marriage until death do us part” (Gail, 2007, p.29).
It is better that Charles thought about it and identified the reason. This would put him at ease and along with some measurable support from his girl friend, he can overcome it.
In short, fear of marriage is becoming more and more common in our society and there are many reasons for this problem ranging from fear of change to careers to difference in opinions to even a fear of commitment or divorce. Though it may sound absurd for a 19th century person, it is sadly an accepted attitude today. This has contributed to failed marriages and fragmented families and the children born out of such relationships are the ones who are affected the most. “Research shows that divorced people are more likely to commit suicide, develop a serious illness or drinking problem, express feelings of loneliness, and die younger than married people.” (Gail, 2007,p.70). To prevent these issues and to have a healthy and happy life, it is time for everyone to identify the underlying problem and take steps to counter it.
Hicks, Marybeth. “Marriage Hard, but worth the effort.” Washington Times. December 1, 2010: 5.
Synder, Gail. Marriage and Family Issues. Mason Crest, 2007.
Ewen, Callaway. “Monogamy and.